I have an exceptional child and I sometimes feel inadequate on knowing how to raise her. My husband feels I need to be more involved in guiding her, but I sense she already knows her way. What do you recommend?
For reasons I am not able to explain, I am a child in a very mentally advanced body. I am therefore able to tell you how a wise child experiences life. All she knows is that she knows hardly anything about getting on in the material world. This insight has the following consequences:
- She is like a sponge for knowledge — especially about her environment and the bizarre (from her perspective) behavior of humans. She asks many questions.
- She gets very frightened about leaving her mother's presence and panics when around other caregivers or when left alone.
- She could feel nausea and overwhelm around others — especially crowds and strangers. She will need lots of alone time after mingling with others. This is because of her empathic abilities.
- Her dreamtime is so active, that sleep is exhausting and she needs lots of sleep. It's hard to keep a secret from her. She even knows what's happening in the next door neighbors house… and the world of information that bombards her most of the time, may create obsessive escape mechanisms like gaming or TV.
- She seems too serious to others and very introverted. She comes across as not being sociable. But she is unable to relate to the outer world and her inner world is too intense to share with others. She is happiest in her own company. She doesn't understand concepts like "fun" or most things others find "funny".
- She takes every criticism to heart and even a minor criticism may haunt her for years. She is trying very hard to adjust to a very abnormal world (from her perspective).
- If you guide her, you will have to carefully explain why you are giving the advice you're giving and what the consequences would be of not heeding your advice.
- Tell her she has the right to make her mistakes but, as long as she is under your care as her mother, when you see that her choice could potentially cause lifelong damage to her or her future, you will insist on her heeding your advice.
The worst thing you can do to her is to bully and enforce your point of view because of her appearing to be impaired or not knowledgeable. She thrives from love and appreciation. Her contribution to your life may be different than what you expect, but acknowledging whatever her contribution is, and how hard she tries, encourages rather than damages her.