Do things we learn, attributes we acquire or lose, stay that way from lifetime to lifetime? For example: innocence, once lost, can never be retrieved?
Knowledge is not useful until it's tested through application. If insights are gained in this life, it has to be applied through experience. If it remains only as unexpressed insight, it will have to be regained and expressed in the next lifetime. Living our highest truth, therefore, lessens hard knocks as a way of prodding us into living our insights along our future eternal journey.
I understand that your concern is for the loss of innocence of loved ones. So, to address that specifically: don't think of loss of innocence as an insurmountable tragedy, but rather as the beginning of wisdom. The wisdom to know that all is not as it seems in other people, is a teacher of intuitive knowing. We cannot trust reason, nor our senses, in knowing what lies behind the appearances of respectability.
Our inner knowing is a trustworthy guide — all too often argued away in the name of rationalization. It is a valuable companion to accompany us throughout our lives...